Pages

3/25/12

Cabby: Ride with our advice columnist

Dear Cabby: Even more people are pressuring me to drop out of the race after  I  lagged in  Louisiana. I still think I'm absolutely and completely the brightest hope for the Republican Party to win in November. What should I do?  --Newt G., Georgia.


Dear Newt G: Yada-yada-yada...  maybe if ya'd shaddup for a minute people would vote for ya.  I read in da paper dat da campaign is in debt.  You and  Callista in the city to enjoy some retail therapy? Gotta keep da ladies smilin', Newt.  I hope you're keepin' accurate campaign  accounts. If you owe any money in Vegas, what stays  in Vegas will be your ass, Newt. Here's Tiffany's. Don't charge his credit account, lady. He's goin' to have a tough time payin' it off on the college lecture circuit. Nah, forget the tip, Newt. Ya gonna need it more than I do.--Cabby.