Pages

4/29/12

Barack Obama's Diary

Dear Diary: I have a blinding  face-ache after the White House Correspondents' Dinner,  having to grin all evening at every jest,  however feeble.   As for Me, I was hilariously  funny, if I  may say so myself, and I do. The audience were so astonished at the sublime humor of some of  my jokes  that,  instead of laughing they fell into awed silence. Hillary looked daggers at me when I joked about her drunk-texting from Cartagena.  I'm glad that I canned the original joke: " I did not have textual intercourse with that... woman."  No sense of humor in Hillary. None at all.
I  am still rehearsing my Spanish in preparation for  the White  House  Cinco de Mayo party. "Hola, Jennifer Lopez, que pasa? "  and  "Hola,  Marco Rubio!  Eat alligators, bitch."  I'm  dog  very tired. A quick prayer of congratulations to Myself, close laptop, then slide into bed with Boo-boo, my blankey. Barry love Boo-boo.. um-num-num-um...Buenos noches, Boo-boo. Hasta la vista, Diary. And so to bed.