Dear Diary: Another exhausting day of campaigning, this time in Mansfield and Akron, Ohio. It is most tiresome having to constantly remind people of my [blindingly obvious] superiority to Mitt Romney, with his soft, pink, upperclass hands and Fifth Avenue haircut. However often it is explained to them, voters are foolishly resistant to the idea that government should own everything, including what they earn, graciously returning to them a small fraction for personal use. Once you've read Karl Marx, it's plain commonsense. I am back now in the White House, hoping that I will not be required to make a gutsy call if Syria's WMDs start falling into the wrong hands. I could plead sudden illness and let Joe decide what to do, but he's quite likely to mistake Syria for Somalia. Awkwaard. My blankey, Boo-boo awaits. A quick prayer to myself and so to bed. Barry luv Boo-boo, um-num-num-um...zzzzz...