Dear Journal: I've been told to be in Tampa next week for the Republican National Convention. I thought my role there was to act as a critic and decoy. But --heaven forbid-- maybe I'm supposed to address the convention. I'm sure I have been a Democrat all my life. Could I be confused? I can't ask Barry the Kid because he will launch into his usual tedious routine of asking me what day, month and year it is. Simple: Wednesday, April 18, 2008. I had best start working on a speech to have it ready just in case. "Friends, Republicans and country folk, lend me your ears." That will make a good opening.