Dear Diary: I have been practicing my scowls and terrifying looks of anger, coached by Michelle who is a master of the contemptuous stare. Mittman has been creeping up on me in the opinion polls despite my powerful showing in the first debate. He will be blown away when we meet in the next debate. He will be facing a far more formidable foe. To add yet more ammunition to my fearsome rhetorical weaponry, Joe has been training me in the art of the amused snort and dismissive smirk. I need a phrase to match Joe's " load of malarkey " And then I'll be good to go.