Dear Diary: I'm still nursing a bruised left shoulder after skeet shooting for the camera and accidentally blasting Michelle's cabbage patch with shotgun pellets. The resulting photo was unconvincing and the press office decided to go instead with a picture from last August of me skeetering at Camp David. Valerie Jarrett was concerned that right-wing bloggers would gleefully set to work manipulating the image. The press office decided that an explicit warning against manipulation would be enough to stop any mischief. Fat chance. Within an hour the Internet was humming with images beclowning me. We had a superbowl party this evening for some friends and family. The kitchen whipped up Chesapeake Crab Cakes and San Francisco Cioppino Stew with beers from the two cities. For a while it was again good to be king. Then the lights went out. Someone suggested that it might be Energy Secretary Steven Chu's revenge for having to leave my Cabinet. Naah, It was Bush's fault.
