And so it was that my cunning scheme was hatched. We would send a group of Secret Service agents to track Hassan Rouhani and position me to ensure that we would meet in a corridor for a while so I can claim a significant diplomatic coup of the kind that NBC's Chuck Todd and Andrea Mitchell. will praise on the evening news. I had just had my last mouthful of two eggs over-easy and wholewheat toast, when the two-way radio of one of my Secret Service detail crackled to life. "Target on the move." My agent replied: "10-4.. Renegade leaving now. He took me by the upper arm and led me to the stairwell. "One floor down, Mr President and we should be perfectly positioned to intercept President Rouhani"
I skipped lightly down the stairs as is my wont, into the passage below and immediately encountered President Rouhani and his entourage. We both stopped and weighed each other up. "Greetings Al-Obama! said Rouhani whose head was wrapped in what appeared to be a white bandage. I spoke: "President Rouhani... I'm so sorry to see that you have injured your head."
" Injured my head?" He pointed to his headwear. "This is my traditional headcovering, al-Obama, not a bandage,"
I said: " Remember, President Rouhani, not to be aggressive when you address the General Assembly this afternoon,. The US doesn't do pinpricks."
"You don't scare me," said Rouhani. "Putin said you're a wuss. I agree." But enough about me.