Barack Obama's Diary: Suckers, it was a prank

Dear Diary:  What if I threw a huge healthcare party and nobody came? If you were to smoke a cigar-sized joint of Maui Wowie, as I did this morning, you would find it as funny as I do. Bwaaah!ha!ha! I have decided to get through  this whole daymare by treating it as a huge prank that Kathleen Sibelius and I have played on the American people. Geddit? Affordable Care Act!  Suckers thought that I could create medical care that they  could afford. That's like expectin' Mike Bloomberg to create a Gigantic Soda Act.
Joe Biden showed his brighter side when he  came into the Oval Office this morning and suggested that we spin the whole Act as the result of a typo and it is really the Affluent Care Act which  forces the rich to invest all their money in the US Treasury where big Government would take care of it for ever. Valerie loved the  idea and reckoned most liberals would, too.
Then there is the other vexing problem I am facing, and that is how to placate Frau Merkel and  Monsieur Hollande who are seething with indignation at being listened in on by the NSA. No other leaders are making such a fuss and that's probably because they know that we have much more dirt on them that they have on us. But enough about me.