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6/27/13

Barack Obama's Diary: Goats and gay rights

Dear Diary: Auuugh!  I get no respect for my awesomeness over here.  Everyone is black so no-one  thinks I'm special. I made a perfectly sensible speech about gay rights  yesterday, saying that all of Africa should treat gays equally. President Macky immediately said they would allow nothing of the kind  in Senegal and jail was the proper place for  'homosexuals'. I asked him: "How do you win office without the  votes of gays?
President Macky said: "We don't have 'em so I don't need 'em." Macky added: "By the way, Vlad Putin called me yesterday and told me that, if you get out of line, I should publicly refer to you as 'Bath-house Barry.'  Is that OK, "Bath-house Barry?"
The impudence! Tonight's State dinner is goin' to be awkwaard.  I guess it will be a  bowl of boiled goat and cassava accompanied by small talk with people who only speak Senegalese or French. Nobody knows the troubles I seen. But enough about me.