Pages

3/23/14

Progress Notes for Patient 540463: Obama, Barack H.

March 22: Valerie Jarrett called me, saying that she had heard from the White House kitchen that Patient had gone off the dietary rails while Michelle and her mother were in China with the girls. He was apparently eating huge steaks, French fries with ketchup and tubs of  Haagen Dazs icecream. I visited patient in his private apartment, re-activated his hypnotic trance and strongly suggested that he control his appetite before Michelle returns from Beijing, questions the chefs about his meals and all hell breaks loose. ---Dictated by S.H. Rink, M.D.