5/1/13

Barack Obama's Diary: Vanishing Jobs

Dear Diary: I am exasperated. So-called economists have been forecasting an increase of 150,000 jobs in April, but the  actual number is  only 119,000. I am a better economist than most economists, apart from the tiny- but-perfectly-formed Paul Krugman, a fellow Nobel prizewinner. Spend, spend spend, he says, so I have. And this is the result. My aides blame it on the opening of the Bush  Library and I suspect they are correct. Who can look at Jeb Bush as a possible White House occupant and confidently go out and hire people?  Another source of my annoyance is the Saudis who claim they sent us a written warning about the Boston bombers. I can't read Arabic, so how does their letter  change anything? The FBI have arrested two more suspects in the Boston bombings and  I have  just put a call through to Eric The Withholder to  make sure that he is ready to Mirandize them if they start confessing stuff that  could embarrass us. Then to rub salt in my wounds the Gitmo prisoners are on hunger strike. But enough about me, it's time for dinner.