Dear Diary: Home again after showing the G20 attendees what a real statesman looks like. I was pleased to see the media carried video of me disembarking at Andrews AFB. It takes a lot of practice to prepare for that signature descent, springy feet, hands at belt level, never holding a handrail. I am back in the White House now awaiting my instructions tomorrow from Valerie Jarrett. I am going to have a busy weekend calling Congressmen to persuade them that being granted an exception from ObamaCare brings with it certain obligations, like endorsing wars of my choice. And I have chosen Syria. After all, what can possibly go wrong? My generals want a specific objective and a thoughtful strategy. But I'm a better general than my generals. I have already shown Vlad Putin who is boss on his own turf. Bashar al-Assad is chicken feed. None can withstand the force of my will. But enough about me.