It seems that being a colony wasn't so bad, after all

A majority of Jamaicans believe they would be better off if the British had never ceded control of the country , a poll reveals. If Obama wins four  more years, how many  Americans  might  begin to feel  the same way?

Anvil Award: We have a Winner!

Anvil  for Irony 
The  LC's  Anvil Award  for  Irony has a clear winner today in Chris Hansen, renowned for conducting  Dateline  TV stings against sexual  predators. Hansen is married  but  has been recorded on hidden cameras  with a   blonde former TV reporter who is 20 years his junior. London's Daily Mail has more here .
Notice, too, how  the LC's prediction  that British-based, but US-focused, news sites would rapidly  muscle their way  into the  US  market, is becoming more evident  by the day. British tabloids understand  what most people  really want --  news and comment  that take  a strong, populist viewpoint,  plus gossipy entertainment -- and they give it to them.


"Me? I'd have made a GREAT President"
Drawing by Alagram

Kerry: I would have been a good president

John Kerry was cornered into answering  a question from Don Imus whether Kerry would have made a better president than  Obama (the obvious answer:  anybody  would have)  but he avoided that, saying instead: "I would have been a good President,  maybe a great one." Fortunately, we will never have the chance to find out.

Blaming corporate jet tax breaks? That simply doesn't fly, Mr President

Increased corporate jet tax breaks came from  the Obama stimulus, says  Doug Powers at  Michelle Malkin's blog. Now Obama turns around and denounces  the recipients of  his stimulus money as though it's their fault. Meanwhile the Campaigner-in-Chief jets around in a 747 for which he doesn't pay a cent.


What's really historic about Obama... Hint: It's not the color of his skin

There's no-one like Rush  Limbaugh when he's on top of his game: “We Americans are not perfect but one thing we did that we will pay for for decades to come and our children and grandchildren will pay for, is the election of a man to the presidency who is historic in the sense of his ignorance, his stubbornness, his incompetence, and his contempt for the American system. That’s what’s historic about Barack Obama. Not the color of his skin."


"Whaddya mean: you want  more credit? Think you're Obama?
Drawing by Alagram

Mr. President? Hello...hello...is anybody there?

A New York friend describes  President  Obama by quoting Gertrude Stein: " There is no there there."


Is this the most tasteless magazine cover ever?

 Newsweek's  cover
 My normally cheery disposition turned sour when I noticed, with mounting incredulity,  the Newsweek cover (right) that uses  image manipulation  technology  to bring Princess Diana back from the dead and place her walking down a street alongside  the former Kate Middleton, now Duchess of Cambridge.  I am not easily shocked, but I found this more tasteless than anything I can remember seeing in a mainstream  publication. No amount of Photoshopping will bring Newsweek back from the dead if editor Tina Brown  continues to drive  a  blunt stake through its once-proud  heart with creepy,  crude and  cruel
 sensationalism like this.
(Hat tip: Mediaite).

FITZ N' STARTZ on Tuesday

"The raise we promised you. It's in drachmas"
Drawing by Alagram

When Reality Bites, Go on Strike

Denying reality is a union specialty. Greek unions are on a two-day general strike today  and members are rioting in the streets of Athens  once more as the   threat looms  of  new  austerity measures  being rejected by  the Greek Parliament. That would lead to  'economic suicide' according to the Governor of the Bank of Greece. Consequences would be  an immediate exit from the Euro, a  return to the drachma, a massive  run on the banks as well as general economic chaos.  Can a coup be far behind? 
Meanwhile, Britain faces a union strike by 750,000 public sector workers on Thursday, over  plans to reduce taxpayer subsidies of their unsustainable  pension plans which already cost each  UK household around 1000 Pounds ($1600) a year. Yet these self-centered leftists  think they are owed it. As usual, it's all about them.
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More British are coming! More British are Coming!

In the wake of the London Daily Mail's new US-centric website, comes news that the London-based
 Guardian  -- the Bible of British liberals  -- is doing the same. The invention of the railways , enabled newspapers to be printed in London and distributed nationally in time to be on breafast tables  throughout the  country,  British newspapers have been locked  in mortal combat ever since. With  the  Internet, that competitiveness is gradually spreading  beyond Britain's shores through the whole English-speaking world. I  mostly disagree with The Guardian's editorial viewpoints, but I welcome the chance to learn what the other side is thinking . After all, I already know what I think.  British newspapers  tend to be  to  more openly partisan  than  those in the US, because the wide diversity of choice on every newsstand means that they don't feel as obliged to  be as dispassionate as a one-town  monopoly newspaper in the US. Circulation is king.
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Dear L.C....Our Question Corner

Dear L.C: I read today that the President had kept a promise to a teenager who wanted to meet Justin Bieber. If he can do that why can't he keep his promise of  bringing change to Washington? --Puzzled Democrat.

Dear Puzzled:  It's Simple. He can't delegate all  that  hopey-changey-stuff  to an aide. They're all at Andrews Air Force Base playing golf with him --L.C.

Survey: "Sex workers" more trusted than journalists, say Aussies

"Sex workers" are more trusted by Australians than journalists, according to a magazine survey.  That's not surprising when many Aussie  leftie  journalists are so dedicated to their PC agenda that they won't call a prostitute a prostitute.

Winner! Lunatic lefties of the day

A clear winner among  Lunatic Lefties today: At a school  in Stockholm called 'Egalia,' Swedes are trying to abolish gender by eliminating gender "stereotypes" ... girls play with boys' toys and vice  versa.. They call kids 'friends' instead of 'him' and 'her'. All this on the taxpayer's Kroner. What these experimenters  think will  happen when these kids  finally enter the real world,  they have not disclosed. Oh well.... you know what they say:  'Boys will be boys,' or, rather,  'Girls will be boys'. Well, at least they can now all get married in New York.


" No, you can't meet Justin Bieber"
Drawing by Alagram

Amazement as Obama Keeps Promise

Justin BieberImage by cukuskumir via Flickr
Yes He Can. President Obama has actually kept a promise, according to  the Daily Caller . It was to arrange for a  teenager who lost her father on 9/11  to meet  with teen idol Justin Bieber (right).

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FITZ N' STARTZ for Today...

" Would you like to sin with
Huma Abedin on a tiger skin?
Or would you prefer to err with her
On some other fur? "
Drawing by Alagram

A Sense of Huma

The New York Daily News  has several  photographs of  former Congressman Anthony Weiner and and wife Huma Abedin, licking  ice cream  while walking on Fifth Avenue today. From the photographs there's not much indication  of how the  two of them are getting along in the wake of Weinergate. But in one shot,  they are holding hands while he carries her bag.


Dimwit Alert!

Gawker has these tales of  wuckfits  indulging in  retail therapy without stopping at the checkout.

Happy Birthday D.G.

The DaleyGator turns three today. The L.C. likes the D.G . and thinks you may, too. Why not pay them a birthday visit here..?


" You drove here wearing a burqa? "
Drawing by Alagram

Woman uses burqa to cheat breath test

A reminder that liberal absurdities are not confined to the northern hemisphere, is this column by Miranda Devine in Australia's Daily Telegraph. Strewth!


Minot flood good for endangered species, say Greenies

Chris Wysocki at Wyblog takes a  sharp hatchet to the Greenies.

Liberals 'make a lobotomized amoeba seem intelligent'

There's nothing more enjoyable than a skilled rant. James Delingpole  of  London's Daily Telegraph takes aim at U.S. liberals and the TV person, Chris Matthews.  They make a lobotomized amoeba  seem  intelligent, complains Delingpole. Here's a  link to one account of  the Matthews "debate" that lit Delingpole's fuse. (In case you were wondering, that's an unlobotomized amoeba on the left)

Fitz n' Startz for Friday

"We named  our baby  'Loozer' "
Drawing: by Alagram 

Children's names: creative or just tacky?

A constant irritation to the L.C. are "creative" names for  children. How would you like to go through life being called "Apostrophe" and, I kid you not, "Clamydia" Here are  more  particularly amazing  examples.  Poor, unfortunate kids.


Dear L.C....Our Advice Corner

 Dear LC : I have a  colleague who is already  trying  to influence  the rest of  us  to vote Obama in 2012.  It's driving me crazy. How can I stop her without making an enemy? -- Angry Republican 
 Dear AR:  Buy  an anti-Obama  bumper sticker. (example:  How do you like that 'change' now, dumb-ass?) Next time she tries to win you over, agree to think about it, give her some reassuring pats on the back, while  sticking  the bumper sticker to her rear.  She'll  only discover it  after wondering why everyone is smirking at her.  No link to you.  Job done.

Fitz n' Startz

"There's  a sticker on your rear. It says dumb-ass."
Drawing by Alagram

Why Sarah Palin trademarked her name

Another Black Conservative has an interesting theory on SP's  trademarking of her name: that it's not just for commercial reasons. The real purpose, speculates ABC,  is most ingenious and  -- as usual -- she's way ahead of  her detractors.


It's going to be NoBama in 2012

George W. Bush' s former adviser  Karl Rove argues that the 2012  election is already  lost  for President Obama..

Fitz n' Startz

"Don't grunt, this isn't Wimbledon."
Drawing by Alagram

Uuuh! Wimbledon women scolded for grunting

Laura Robson at the 2008 Wimbledon championshipsImage via WikipediaGrunting by women players is getting so loud that it's spoiling the world's premier tennis championship, says Wimbledon chief.
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The British are coming! The British are coming!

Daily MailImage via WikipediaThe British are plotting to recolonize America -- this time via news-sites on the Web. The London Daily Mail already outpulls Huffpost. Fierce nationwide competition made British newspaper publishers the most  competitive and ruthless in the world. Potential competitors in the US,  you've been warned.
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Malkin draws a bead on a RINO

Michelle Malkin's stalkin' the Huntsman here

Typo of the Day

 Dykes are blamed for Indian floods. Aha! So lesbians were behind it. Who knew?
(Hat tip: Mark Steyn)


Weiner's staff... er.. team... asks for a camera

There's pathos at Congress as Weiner's staff empty their offices.  Gawker reports that staffers  want to know if anyone can lend them a camera.

A Tweet from BO

Chris Wysocki at Wyblog has the interesting news that President Obama intends to use Twitter in the run-up to the 2012  General Election. The Laughing Conservative looks forward to seeing how Obama explains his Obamacare proposals within the  140 character limit of a Tweet. "Socialized medicine" perhaps? That's just 18 characters.
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The Yellow Light of Texas is the only one for me

Texas has been clever enough to skirt Federally-mandated change from instant-on incandescent light bulbs with their pleasant, slightly yellow light, to the  corpse-like pallor of mercury-toxic compact fluorescents. Local legislation ensures that, if incandescents are made and used in Texas, they can still be sold and used within in that State. There are some shrewd brains under those 10 gallon hats. Who knew? More from Hot Air here

Fitz n' Startz

"Snickers bar? That'll  be life without parole"
Drawing :Alagram 

Arresting Proposals from the Food Police

Oatmeal, wheatbread,   yoghurt, you name it, they  don't want your  kids  to eat it.. Human Events reports on Big Government plans to make the   nutritional choices for your kids  that you alone should be making.


Maybe He'll Find One

Headline: "Biden to Visit Boston for Brain Research Launch" 
(Thanks to Terry Kirkpatrick at Gumbo)

Opening The Conservatory

Two talented bloggers have combined forces, with others, at The Conservatory.  Bookmark them, or find them  in our blog roll

Blame it on Busch

Latest Joke We Heard:
From an nearby  room, a woman hears her husband say:  "I love you"
She asks: "Is that you, or the beer talking?"
He answers: "It's me. I'm talking to the beer."


"It's not easy being blue"
Drawing by alagram

Obummer Stickers

At The Daily Mail, Charleston, West Virgina, Don Surber has assembled  an hilarious collection of anti-Obama bumper stickers. Here is one of them (Hat Tip: Instapundit)


Hold..er.. Delay the Front page!

The New York Post,  famous for its pithy front page headlines has had  a  ball field day with the Weiner affair, as the Enterprise Blog   points out explains (is there no end to the double meanings?)

Acropolis now

" You're Greek?  No credit for YOU " 
Drawing by Alagram 


An Unbeatable Ticket for 2012

 The Looking Spoon has an... er... larger  version of this outstanding comedic bumper sticker.

What's a "green" steak? You don't want to know...

'"It's Not Easy, Being Green,"
 sang Kermit. His creators didn't know how prophetic that would be. Now see where being "green" is taking us.   Warning: You probably don't want to know.

Taxi, Mr. Lama?

There's no joke like a bad joke, says David Quantick


Weiner Wants Out

Anthony WeinerImage via WikipediaThe New York Times website has just published a report  claiming that Anthony Weiner has told friends that he will  resign later today.(Update: he did) The New York Post says he is already looking for a  job. The Laughing  Conservative can confidently predict that suggestions that he open  a hot-dog stand will not be welcome.
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San Francisco floats goldfish ban

The  capital city of the loony left is mulling  a ban on goldfish, tropical fish and guppies. The LC is aware, from eating in many fine Chinese restaurants, that goldfish are an essential part of Feng Shui. Banning their sale  would arguably discriminate against SF's sizable Chinese-American community.
The LC predicts that, if this paradox threatens a psychic meltdown among thousands of Bay City  moonbats, the  fish ban will not become law. 
(Hat Tip: Memeorandum)
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Our Money at Work

Gumbo has this fascinating account of  tax money frittered away and benefits received by  our oh-so- parsimonious leaders.

So the Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop....

Thanks to Gumbo for this hilarious Aussie Today show clip.

Are You Racist?

 Take  this  neat  one-question  quiz  at the  Daily Pundit.

The end of global "warming" ? Cool!

The Apollo 10 Lunar Module Image via WikipediaTwo fascinating links have just arrived from a New York  friend and  former Lunar Excursion Module (left) engineer. 
Read this and then this.
Viewed alone these   are interesting enough. But taken together they suggest a future hasty retreat  by those scientifically illiterate global "warmists" and their destructive "green" agenda. Often  they are not  even tree-huggers, but  socialists hiding behind a Green  disguise to further their anti-free-enterprise agenda.
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Weiner: the trouser snake strikes again

The Weiner  story  just won't go away:  The Congressman  won't quit voluntarily,  which only prolongs the media circus and delays the inevitable.  Now  Gawker is displaying this hilarious visual pun .


A budding curmudgeon confesses

For those getting gray (especially fellow journalists) Bob Simon of 60 Minutes is a legend in his own time. Don't miss this funny and insightful glimpse of his life.

Weiner's wiener doll

OK, Weiner jokes are getting a little limp. But this made me laugh all over again.

Know your enemies: join them!

This shows how valuable  it can be to register with "progressive" sites like MoveOn.org . Conservatives often instinctively avoid them. They shouldn't.  The resulting emails  give priceless insights and alerts. I discovered this after registering with Obama's 1998 campaign site. 
Rule1Know thine enemy.
Rule 2: See Rule 1

Incandescent With Rage

Image via Wikipedia
 This video is a classic skewering of out-of-control regulation. As Goodbye Edison (left) time approaches there's still time to stock up on incandescents. Meanwhile, join the  growing mirth of the Congressman behind the speaker.
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Another lesbian emerges from the wrong closet

First a Syrian lesbian who was not  a lesbian, not Syrian nor even a woman. Now  a prominent  lesbian blogger  reveals that she's  not a lesbian,  not a woman, but Bill Graber,  a married  military man and construction worker, who has has been writing the lesbian blog LezGetReal for three years under the name "Paula Brooks". He said he did it  "with the  best of intentions." The LC recalls that was exactly what the lesbian-who-was-not-Syrian--or-even-a-woman said, after being outed.  Perhaps Anthony Weiner should  try saying he acted with the "best of intentions." Heaven  knows, he's tried everything else. Wait a second...: You don't suppose that he...
The LC is going to bed,  where he can dream happily that all's still Right with the  world..

Actual Saudi Mall Dress Regulations...

This comes from the friend of a  diplomat friend 
of The LC in  Saudi Arabia
where it's displayed
in a mall.

Women's Clothing Regulations in Islam (sic)
Rule 1: To be full body covered
Rule 2: Should not be attractive in it's style
Rule 3: Should not be perfumed
Rule 4: Should be  non transparent and to be thick
Rule 5:  Should be loose and not body tide
Rule 6:  Non men stylish
Rule 7:  Should not be fancy

The LC asks: Snooki, is that you under there?

Syrian lesbian neither lesbian nor Syrian

The author of a  blog supposedly by a lesbian in Damascus,  is a 40-year-old American  student from Georgia  studying in Scotland, says the London Daily Mail. 
The LC  sees the Che Guevara T-shirt  as the  definitive  mark  of  a loony-left  loser who's well past his use-by date  (a student aged 40? "Sheesh!"-- to use a Palinism.)

US in Afghanistan for decades?

Just  after The LC posted the  sarcastic item "More wars, please" (below), came  this.  The LC  hopes the  wish isn't actually being  granted.  Read more at  Positively Right.

Not Always Right

This is not about  Right-wingers  occasionally being wrong (as if...) But a funny blog about crazy customers.
(Hat tip: Gumbo)

More wars, please

Question: Why did Americans elect Obama?
Answer:  Because we wanted more wars
Next Question.
Steve Chapman  conjectures at Reason.com .
(Hat tip: Instapundit)

Empty trash. Buy milk. Make history.

How humble household lists are unlocking the secrets of History.

The Viagra Award Goes to...

Now Weiner Week has  ended, we can present The Viagra Award for Outstanding Weiner joke. It goes to...  National Public Radio:
"Congressman Weiner said the photo leak was a prank, he’s a victim, the picture could be taken out of context. In what possible context would you take this picture? Maybe he meant to send it to his doctor, with the message, "Okay, it's been four hours, time to get you involved."-- from NPR's "Wait Wait…Don't Tell Me!"

Fighting words

070719-A-6849A-335 - 1st Lt. Chris Richelderfe...Image via WikipediaAmerican military officers  in Afghanistan sometimes refer to the official NATO command — called the International Security Assistance Force, or ISAF,  as “I Saw Americans Fighting.”
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