Dear Diary: Amid the tragedies and tribulations of the world there is a shining moment to come: my
Coronation Inauguration. For my second coming I had envisioned a public event like those in North Korea. Vast crowds lining the National Mall, weeping with joy as I pass by, while Holder's agents photograph the faces of any spectators not showing sufficient adoration so they can be added to the NSA's facial recognition database [nicknamed BIWY for Barack Is Watching You]. The sooner we begin to identify and track all conservatives, the easier it will be for Michelle to decree a national diet of celery and nutburgers after she successfully runs for the Oval Office in 2016. President Michelle would, of course, appoint Susan Rice as Secretary of State. For further diversity, I will suggest she appoints a gay Iranian as Defense Secretary. President Ahmadinejad says there are no gay Iranians (they hang them). But I'm sure she could find a suitable defector in the Bay City area.
Where was I? Oh yes... my Inauguration: Valerie Jarrett thinks a North Korean style event would be too lavish for these times. I rather like the symbolism of thousands of people waving flags in unison to pay respect to a great leader such as myself. But Valerie must must be obeyed.
