Barack Obama's Diary: How I showed the Pentagon brass who's boss

Dear Diary:  I had summoned the Pentagon's top brass to the Oval Office today  to reprimand  them for their role in permitting the San Bernadino massacre. "On the contrary," I was told. " We had no role whatsoever in permitting the massacre. So it will be you who will come to us." And so it came to pass that I visited the Pentagon today and was told --in no uncertain terms-- that this land needs a radically new approach to dealing with Jihad and ISIL and, if I don't come up with one quick, I will wake one morning soon with tanks surrounding the People's House. "Traitorous pigs," I said, unabashed. "You will rue this  day of infamy for the rest of your miserable lives."