Barack Obama's Diary: Day of the limping duck

Dear Diary: I think I'm going nuts. Is that a limping duck which I see before me, its beak towards my hand?  The polls are saying that, in the midterms in November, under my leadership, Democrats face the biggest loss to the Republicans since 1894. Hence my hallucinations of a lame duck. I can't even self medicate with weed because Dr Rink has threatened to have me  involuntarily "treated" in a hospital  [in other words fed tranquilizers and removed far from my secret stash of Maui Wowie.] Quaaack! Dr. Rink is such a  threat, that he should be classified as an AR15 assault shrink. But enough about me.