Barack Obama's Diary: Peyton''s Place

Dear Diary: The world is ignoring me and all the headlines are focused on the Superbowl and  Peyton  Manning.  Even  Vlad Putin is thinking of little else. I was eating my Lucky Charms this morning when a hearty chorus from the Moscow Steel Foundry Male Voice choir blasted from my specially-engraved custom-made iPresidentophone. "Good morning Vlad," said I. [For it was he] "Good morning Obamavich," said Putin, who had mocked me mercilessly yesterday for tweeting a photograph of Myself throwing a football "like a little girl."
"Peyton Manning may have had a humiliating day," said Putin. "But for you, Obamavich,  every  day is humiliating. You are -- not to put too fine a point on it -- an embarrassing  sissy".   But enough about me.