Barack Obama's Diary: How to disembark with style

Dear Diary: My enemies are unable to criticize me in one area: The elegant way I descend the stairs from Air Force One: arms bent perpendicular to the ground  hands dangling loosely, every movement controlled, yet seemingly nonchalant. This  skill has not been acquired without effort. Indeed, in the early  days of my presidency I spent hours at Andrews Air Force base practicing  effortless descents, that would project my message of youth and change. I still suits me well. In fact I have mandated that my whole administration  should attend weekly classes in disembarking  in this calm, confident way, that signals to the natives that reinforcements have arrived  and all  is now well. But enough about me.