Dear Diary: I had lunch with Joe Biden today, It was the first time I had met with him since that embarrassing Halloween incident when we took the kids Trick or Treatin' to the Biden residence and Joe appeared at the front door in a Vlad Putin mask and I fled screamin' down the driveway with my Secret Service detail in hot pursuit. Today I was able to explain to Joe that the cause of my extreme reaction was not cowardice (as if!) but a huge joint of Blueberry Yum Yum weed that I had consumed earlier to calm my nerves. It has a kick like an Afghan mule. But enough about me.