Dear Diary: There are indications in the polls that Ferguson is going to cause a backlash among voters that may threaten my immaculate legacy. I have therefore dispatched Eric Holder to Missouri to spread alarm among the natives-- something like this: "Stop rioting, or i'll send busloads of undocumented immigrants to compete for your jobs. Put that in your smoldering Papa John's and eat it." Eric is optimistic that it will work. It's worth a try. But enough about me.