Dear Diary: I had barely taken a break fom Bibi's excoriation of me, when the Song of the Volga Boatmen burbled mournfully from my iPresdientophone. I said "Hello Vlad, [for ir was he] you calling to gloat? " "Obamavitch, what do you expect when you use decades-old Russian rocket engines to launch a 21st Century spacecraft? They make Yuri Gagarin look young. "Gagarin, Obamavich? He was our first man in space." But enough about me.
