Barack Obama's Diary:Oops....my bid to soothe Bibi backfires

Dear Diary: Damn, damn, damn...a thousand times, damn! Bibi appears to have prevailed overwhelmingly in the Israeli elections, despite my Administration's best efforts which will have only further enraged him,  and will make him even more of a thorn in my side. Perhaps I could lessen this with a warm congratulatory phone call over breakfast, I reasoned  When my Honeywheat Cheerios arrived, I speed-dialed Bibi. "Congratulations!" I declared, "on your triumphant election." There was  dead silence from the other end. "Obama" came a familiar  voice,"Have you any idea what time it is here?" "Google it, Bozo....and enjoy your cyanide" The line went dead.